Brad and I went to a corn maze on Saturday night. Wow! I forgot how much fun it is! We went to the Amazing Maize Maze at Cherry Crest Farms on 741 (www.cherrycrestfarm.com) and did the flashlight maze. It was Brad's first time and my first time without being with a youth group.
It was a BLAST! We were walking around at first, just meandering along until we found the first mailbox. Then, the fun began. Brad was amazingly good with a sense of direction and being able to read the map pieces we gathered. Me, on the other hand, was confused and couldn't figure it out for the life of me. But for probably the first time in my life, I was okay with that.
Being a natural leader and dominant person, I usually lead the group when I was in high school. Then, when I was a group leader, I was looked to to get us to the right place at the right time and as quickly as possible (had to beat the boys, duh!!). And when you have a group of people, you have many many many different opinions of which way to go. It can be super overwhelming.
Brad was having fun, and naturally leading the way. And for probably the first time since I can even remember, I was actually having fun! I was able to simply enjoy the experience. To not "have" to care where we were or where we were going or where we had already been.
The sheer freedom and realization that I could let go and let Brad lead without any worries in the world was exhilirating. Brad had a great time, with it being a new thing for him. But I think I may have had an even better time.
I think the next step for me now, is to continue learning to let go. And with my New Year's Resolution (I know, it's been forever), the goal should be to "let go and let God." I am terrified to let go. I am so used to being in control. Of making decisions. Of having to "eenie meenie minee mo"-ing it out. Of being the one who has to choose. Of showing confidence when I'm cowering or wavering inside. Of being the strong one. I know I need to let God be that in my life. Maybe Brad is teaching me how to do that.
Let go and let God.